Counseling Theories Guided Reflection

Assignment:
Corey identifies 14 personal characteristics of effective counselors (pp.16-17). These characteristics are important regardless of the particular counseling theory that the counselor my follow.
1. Which three (3) characteristics do you believe are especially important? Why? Explain.
2. What is one (1) characteristic, not listed, that you believe is important? Why? Explain.

From Corey’s list, the three qualities that I find especially important are Have a sincere interest in the welfare of others, Appreciate the influence of culture, and Authentic, sincere, and honest.Of these three, having a sincere interest in the welfare of others seems the most important to me. This characteristic is needed for the client, the counselor, and the relationship between the two. The client needs the counselor to have an interest in his welfare as a general reason to begin counseling. The client must trust that a (any) counselor is interested in helping before they bring their issues to a complete stranger. Like any profession where you are helping people, the practitioner benefits from this general interest. Like any other job, counseling can be taxing at times, and this genuine caring is one of the many things that can make it rewarding and fuel a counselor’s ambition in her field. Finally, the trust required to form a relationship between the counselor and client is grounded in the understanding that the counselor is interested in helping the client. A counselor without that basic desire cannot be trusted to be working in the client’s interest as opposed to her own.

Appreciating the influence of culture also struck me as a characteristic that cannot be overlooked. A simple example from the campus setting would be helping international students. When an international student comes to a counselor, it can’t be assumed that she is trying to work through the same issues as an American student. When she is dealing with some of the same issues such as stress or time management, she can’t be expected to address them or work through them in the same ways an American student would be expected to. This characteristic becomes even more intricate than understanding that an international student is a different type of homesick than an American student. Cultural differences exist within our country. Every day that this Yankee spends in the south makes it more apparent how my Catholic upbringing has influenced who I am and how I think about things. I didn’t anticipate it before I came, but moving south was moving into a different culture even though I never left the country. I think in general, I was raised with the same or similar values as my peers in the south, but I think that the emphasis on those values varied greatly.

The third quality that I find especially important is being authentic, sincere, and honest. This one is vital to building and maintaining the trust that the counseling relationship is based on. I think the reason this one stuck out to me is because of how much I would like to be characterized by it. That is not to say that I think I am inauthentic, but I don’t know that it is on the list of top characteristics that people would use to describe me. I have heard people call me cheerful, friendly, responsible, caring, trustworthy, and probably even honest, but I don’t think that anyone has ever used the words authentic or sincere. I could strive to be more authentic or more sincere, though I’m not sure how I would begin. Even if I managed to work on my sincerity, I’m not sure that I would be striking people as sincere. I am drawn to it, because it is a quality that I would like to be known for. Maybe it is just a matter of semantics. It is probable that people believe I am sincere and authentic, but they are not my most noticeable or displayed qualities, or maybe they are not words the people who describe me normally think of when describing people.

This brings me to the characteristic that is not listed that I believe should be. It has been mentioned that there are counseling theories that focus more on the actions and the body language of the client than on what it is they want to talk about. This may be an early indicator that those theories are not for me, but an Appreciation for language should be a part of this list. I don’t believe that life can be whittled down to just semantics, but I do believe that language carries more than just the meanings of the words. What I am talking about is the combination of denotation and connotation in the words that people are using to describe their issues. In counseling, I think the connotations become even more important and telling. The words people choose while talking are clues to their beliefs, values and opinions. Some of the values are long held, and some of the opinions are formed in that instant. Either way, there is so much information to be taken from what people are saying that extends beyond the simple definitions of the words they are using.